Sunday, December 13, 2009


Honestly i've always dislike my chinese name.. heck, i don't even know how to write it in chinese! :p hence when i started college, i introduced myself as nicole.. and it stuck there for 10 years now! haha..

Anyway, since long long time ago i secretly wish that i'd married to a caucasian.. coz i want beautiful kids!

My grandma told me that she had caucasian men going after her when she was younger.. she was a tea lady in unilever.. first she was a factory worker.. wrapping up soaps.. then she was promoted to tea lady as she can speak a lil tiny bit of english.. ok ok.. at least she understands, hot, cold, sugar, milk, coffee and tea.. haha..

So since she was the tea lady, she met alot of caucasian men.. she was in her early 20s.. around 50 years ago.. she always get them waiting at her doorstep to send her to work in their car.. BUT she always turn them down! i asked her why.. she said most of them are married!

Now, i am married to a... (hmmmm... 30%?) caucasian guy.. haha.. which makes him eurasian.. i saw my bb's family tree.. dated back year 1700.. his ancestors are from dudley, UK.. no wonder he felt like home when we were in UK :p

Besides getting an 'unique' name after married, i am sure that our kids will be pretty and good looking :)) i hope they will get his long curl lashes, high bridge pointy nose and height and MY fair skin genes! lol... as for him, he wish they will get my small eyes, small nose and my fair skin =.="

Now, people knows that i'm married to a westwood (mrs westwood).. but how i wish i could officially change my name to Nicole Westwood.. sigh~

When the first time my bb applied a supplementary credit card for me (before we were married), i asked him 'can i put nicole westwood on the card?'.. he thought for awhile.. he said 'you can BUT what if when the cashier sees the name and then they will think it's a stolen card? as nicole westwood sounds caucasian while you're PURE chinese' i hate to say it but he's right.. DAMMIT!

So, now i can only put my name as nicole westwood on those social network sites.. sigh~~


Anonymous said...

You can change your name to Nicole Westwood if you want to. Just go to JPN and ask what is the procedure. You have to visit the Commissioner of Oath to sign some papers stating the reason of you changing your name. Then put it in the application to JPN to have it changed. Go do it girl since you want to have a "mat salleh" name. With so many mix races out there nowadays, having these name for a pure chinese chick like you is common, honey.

:: Nicole.F :: said...

thanks anon.. maybe i should change my name.. as i don't see any reason for me to keep my surname or chinese name.. as my parents are divorced, my dad doesn't even keep in touch with me AND when my grandfather died, no one ask me to go to the funeral.. so i was not consider as family.. that really broke my heart..

Eugene said...

Saw your chinese name before but can't remember it now! hmm.....

Anonymous said...

fucking racist goldigger whore... wan mat salleh... look at your face... you chinese be proud of it... you never be mat salleh no use change name...hope you husband find some one better and divorced you...

:: Nicole.F :: said...

anon: i know i'm a chinese.. i'm not saying that i want to be a mat salleh.. if i am a wannabe mat salleh, i'd have make my hair blonde, have fake accent, wear blue contacts and etc..

'She take my money, well I'm in need
Yeah she's a triflin' friend indeed
Oh she's a gold digger way over time
That digs on me

(She steal me money)
Now I ain't sayin' she a gold digger (When I'm in need)
But she ain't messin' wit no broke Niggaz (She steal me money)
Now I ain't sayin' she a gold digger (When I'm in need)
But she ain't messin' wit no broke Niggaz(I gotta leave)
Get down girl, go 'head get down (I gotta leave)
Get down girl, go 'head get down (I gotta leave)
Get down girl, go 'head get down (I gotta leave)
Get down girl, go 'head

[Verse 1:]
Cutie da bomb
Met her at a beauty salon
With a baby Louis Vuitton
Under her under arm
She said I can tell you rock
I can tell by ya charm
Far as girls you got a flock
I can tell by ya charm and ya arm
but I'm lookin' for the one
have you seen her?
My psychic told me she gonna have a ass like Serena
Trina, Jennifer Lopez, four kids
An' I gotta take all they bad ass to show-biz
Okay get ya kids but then they got they friends
I pulled up in the Benz, they all got up in
We all went to din and then I had to pay
If you fuckin' with this girl then you betta' be paid
You know why
Take too much to touch her
From what I heard she got a baby by Busta
My best friend say she used to fuck with Usher
I don't care what none of y'all say I still love her

(she steal me money)
Now I ain't sayin' she a gold digger (When I'm in need)
But she ain't messin' wit no broke niggas (she steal me money)
Now I ain't sayin' she a gold digger (When I'm in need)
But she ain't messin' wit no broke niggas (I gotta leave)
Get down girl, go 'head get down (I gotta leave)
Get down girl, go 'head get down (I gotta leave)
Get down girl, go 'head get down (I gotta leave)
Get down girl, go 'head

[Verse 2:]
18 years, 18 years
She got one of yo' kids, got you for 18 years
I know somebody payin' child support for one of his kids
His baby momma's car crib is bigger than his
You will see him on TV, any given Sunday
Win the Superbowl and drive off in a Hyundai
She was supposed to buy ya shorty Tyco with ya money
She went to the doctor got lipo with ya money
She walkin' around lookin' like Michael with ya money
Shoulda' got that insured, GEICO for ya moneeey(your money)
If you ain't no punk holla' we want pre-nup
It's something that you need to have
'Cause when she leave yo' ass she gon' leave with half
18 years, 18 years
And on her 18th birthday, he found out it wasn't his?

(she steal me money)
Now I ain't sayin' she a gold digger (When I'm in need)
But she ain't messin' wit no broke niggas (she steal me money)
Now I ain't sayin' she a gold digger (When I'm in need)
but she ain't messin' wit no broke niggas (I gotta leave)
Get down girl, go 'head get down (I gotta leave)
Get down girl, go 'head get down (I gotta leave)
Get down girl, go 'head get down (I gotta leave)
Get down girl, go 'head

Now I ain't sayin' you a gold digger, you got needs
You want a dude to smoke, but he can't buy weed
You go out to eat, can't pay, y'all can't leave
There's dishes in the back, he gotta roll up his sleeves
But while y'all washin', watch him
He gon' make it to a Benz out of that Datsun
He got that ambition, baby look in his eyes

This week he's moppin' floors, next week it's the fries
So, stick by his side
I know these dude's ballin, and yeah that's nice
And they gon' keep callin' and tryin'
But you stay right, girl
But when you get on, he leave yo' ass for a white girl'

:: Nicole.F :: said...

some ppl just never read my post properly.. or maybe they don't understand english at all..

yea yea.. my hubby gonna divorce me and find someone better.. whatever la.. only time will tell

Anonymous said...

hahaha yes only time will tell who meets their husband on a forum??? so lame... the only reason you when out with him cause he had a GTR and his rich and his mat salleh...

so thats conclude's you racist and a goldigger...

the reason he married you cause if he married a pretty girl he have to worry of her cheating when his away...
but with you no need to worry la cause other guys won't even look at your face...thats why he married you lol

:: Nicole.F :: said...

logically, no one would want to spend/invest money and time to something/someone useless/worthless..

if russ is to marry me coz i'm ugly and won't have the ability to cheat, then he could have any other ugly girl.. but why me?

in order for him not to have any headache@worried some pretty girls would cheat when he's away, he can just be single and have different girls every day..

BUT why would he want to marry an ugly gold digger whore who love his money only? AND yet he still keep spending his hard earn money on me.. with NO return.. just only my love for his money.. it's ridiculous right?

why would he risk his money by giving me credit cards, car, money when he thinks i'm a gold digger?

so means russ is an idiot? is stupid? no, it's coz he loves me alot and trust me.. he feels my sincere love for him.. he knows i'm not a gold digger hence that is why he loves spending money on me..

anyway, if all of u out there who were to see in that perspective of yours, means that in calculation russ has absolutely no advantages in this marriage.. poor him, married to an ugly gold digger and get nothing back in return..

let's see.. in overall..

my advantages :
- he's rich
- he's mat salleh

his advantage :
- has an ugly wife who won't have the ability to cheat

his disadvantage :
- spending money on a gold digger who doesn't love him

does all that even makes sense? investing a marriage which doesn't give him anything in return? who would be THAT idiot?

sugarpurple said...

oh anon, it's really not a nice thing to say. You seem to insult Nicole & make Russ seem so perfect. No offense to Russ, I mean we are only human & nobody is perfect, there is no such thing as perfect either! It doesnt make her a bad person just because she doesnt have to work and can afford the finer things in life. When people get married they vow to share everything & wealth included. Please dont be such a sour grape; instead use that energy making yourself happy.

:: Nicole.F :: said...

sugarpurple : thanks for your comment..

yes, no one is perfect.. not even russ.. even he admitted that..

i always count my blessings.. that russ loves me this much and i have what every girl would want.. i'm just very very very lucky.. that is why i never take him/his love for granted

cheryl said...

hi Nicole ,

lemme share my exprience here of having a slighly diffrent name. To begin with im a Portuegese mix Baba Nyonya. My dad is a Portuegese and mom baba nyonya . And growing up aint fun. I get teased in school because of my surname. When i fill up forms, i get questions like "Are you a local or foreingner". " you look diffrent la , what race are you". I felt the akward one in school,and I hate when teachers trying to pronounce my last name. cos none of them got it right.

chill out kay, take it easy


:: Nicole.F :: said...

cheryl: so u have to fill in 'dan lain-lain' as your race? hehe.. same as russ too

Cheryl said...

yea ... " lain-lain" some even kepo, "what race are you actually ?" . Looking back , I laugh at it, thinking how shallow minded these ppl are.As I grow up I tend to appreciate my name more, and do not feel akward no more. As our conutry is multi-racial.

:: Nicole.F :: said...

oh well, some ppl are just shallow and narrow minded.. changing my name doesn't mean that i'm a wannabe mat salleh.. it's coz i'm married and i want to take after my husband's family name..

plus i don't feel i'm part of the foong family anymore since that day my grandfather died.. i was so sad that i'm not asked to attend the funeral.. some more i'm the only grandchild who is carrying the foong surname on my dad's side as he's the only son..

i'm not even close to wanting to change my name.. just a thought.. don't know why some ppl is making a big fuss about it

:: Nicole.F :: said...

and of course i'm proud to be a chinese.. but not to be a foong.. the reason why my bb is attracted to me coz i'm chinese with small eyes and fair skin.. and oh, coz i'm ugly too! :)

hmmm.. maybe i should change my name, bleach my hair and eyebrow, make my eyes bigger, go under the knife to make my nose smaller and pointy and put BIG fake boobs.. THEN i can live up to those ppl who claims that i want to be a mat salleh.. LOL!

fyi, my hubby isn't mat salleh.. i said eurasian.. does that even make him white at all??

oh no, i think i'm color blind.. i made a mistake.. i should go for a 100% pure mat salleh.. ok ok, let me divorce him first.. rofl

cheryl said...

Maybe some people took it the wrong way. Can't change their mind set. What we belief in ourselves that matters most. Some took it to the extreme level.Cyber bully perhaps . Giving nasty comments. It's their loss for not wantd to know more.

Sam Lee said...

i love people who like to comment here but dare not put their email address, or whatever up here, only dare to put anonymous

those are keyboard warriors....ahha

wish those keyboard warrior die in hell :D

:: Nicole.F :: said...

warriors? hahaha.. should be 'warriors'